


The walls between

by joopfoop



Category: Great Gatsby - F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby (2013)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Everyone Is Alive, Everyone Is Gay, Fluff and Angst, Gay, Gay Panic, Gay Romance, Lesbian, Lesbian Character, Lesbian Romance, Light-Hearted, Long-Distance Relationship, Love at First Sight, M/M, Romance, Slow Burn, Useless Gays, jk unless
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-12
Updated: 2021-02-02
Packaged: 2021-03-16 18:20:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 8,875
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28711140
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/joopfoop/pseuds/joopfoop
Summary: Nick Carraway is an english major with an issue. An issue where he can never get the perfect boyfriend. But when he sees The Mystery Man across the way he thinks his luck has changed. But there's a global pandemic, so he can't just go across and say hey.   What ever will he do?
Relationships: Jordan Baker/Daisy Buchanan, Nick Carraway/Jay Gatsby
Comments: 7
Kudos: 15





	1. Character Introductions

**Author's Note:**

> See the note at the end for more information about this

Nick Carraway :   
An english major with a major crush for a mystery man across the way, but he just doesn't know it yet.  
Age: 21  
Sexuality : Gay  
Personality type : INFJ

Jay Gatsby :   
A sports major on a football scholarship, but maybe he's not as jocky as he thinks.  
Age : 22  
Sexuality : straight?  
Personality type : ISTP

Jordan Fisher :  
A sports major on a tennis scholarship. Nick's loud vaporwave lesbian friend. Nick and Jordan once dated in high school, but then they made each other realise they they were gay.  
Age : 21  
Sexuality : Lesbian  
Personality type : ESFJ

Daisy Carraway :  
Nick's cousin who's a fashion major. She looks up to Nick greatly, despite only being 2 months younger than him.  
Age : 20  
Sexuality : Straight?  
Personality type : INFP

Tom Buchanan :  
A law major and Nick's ex and Daisy's current boyfriend with a fragile relationship. No one trusts him as he brought Nick a great amount of pain.  
Age : 22  
Sexuality: Bisexual  
Personality type : ESTJ

a playlist for nick and jay <3

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/6ukdE4ayLzf6FtNhY4UB5K?si=AXHET3OyR22tMY6kv2e9AQ


	2. chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> nick falls in love whoops

It was March 24th and England had been in lock down for 1 day. Most people were fine but Nick Carraway was not. He didn't have a roommate in his dorm, so he was alone. His next door neighbour Jordan Baker shared a room with Daisy Carraway, his cousin. Jordan was ecstatic at the idea of being locked inside a room for a month with just a woman. Opposite his room, Nick's ex Tom lived, sharing a room with someone none of them had heard of before. Jordan gave hints that she knew him, but she wouldn't tell anyone even a smidge of information about the mystery man. Nick was an English major, Jordan was doing physical education and Daisy was a fashion major. Nick knew what Tom was studying, but he pushed it to the back of his mind, as so he would forget everything he could about Tom. 

On occasion, Nick would see glimpses of this mystery man from across the way, but only ever blurs. Nick thought these blurs were quite dashing, he wished he would see more of him some day. Jordan said that he was kinda rude, but Nick refused to believe her. One day, the blur stopped in front of the window and Nick finally had a good look. He had neat, straight blonde hair, open like curtains across his forehead. He was medium tall, about 6'0" but had large biceps making his frame look much bigger than it was. Nick just stood gazing when the man turned around. They made brief eye contact and for one moment, one fleeting moment everything stopped. The world fell silent and everything was dropped. It was only Nick Carraway and Mystery Man. But, just like every moment, it ended quickly and the world started up again. A flame lit up in Nick's heart but he just didn't know it yet. 

A few days passed, and the thought of the blonde haired man never left Nick's mind. He hadn't seen him since that fleeting moment, but he still saw the blur every so often. Eventually one day, he saw a neon flash as he walked by his window. Nick took a step back to find the word 'hey' plastered across the Mystery Man's window in orange post its. Nick knew what he had to do so he immediately called Jordan to come next door.

"JORDAN! Get over here right now!" he yelled into the phone.

"UGHHHHHHH. Nick, you are SUCH a pain.Give me a couple minutes, me and Daisy were chatting and bonding." Jordan replied, a tone of disdain in her voice. She arrived with Daisy a few minutes later, bags were obvious under her eyes.

"Nick, what the ever loving fuck do you want. It better be good." Jordan said, groaning with every word.

"...post its." Nick replied, fearing the worst explosion from Jordan.

"POST ITS? POST IT FUCKING NOTES?"

"Jorgy, come on, you know Nick can't leave. Let's just go get them." Daisy said, touching Jordan's shoulder to calm her down. Jordan took a deep breath and turned around to the door.

"This is the last time I do anything for you, Carraway." Jordan said angrily.

Nick kept on apologising, over and over until he was sure that they were out of ear shot. While he was waiting for Daisy and Jordan to return with his post its, he decided to rearrange some of his furniture. He moved his desk to in front of his window so he could gaze into the blonde man's window for longer, he moved his bed to the other side of the room so that the blonde man could see him if he wanted to. 

Daisy and Jordan returned a few hours later with a bag full of many different colours of post its so that Nick would be so demanding again. He immediately took out a pack and stuck them up so they made the word 'hi!'. He put a little smiley face afterwards for good luck. It was only about a half hour later when the post its in the opposite window to spell out 'name?' Nick took no haste in tearing down his post its and replacing it with 'Nick :) u?' It was only another 10 minutes until the word 'Jay' appeared in the opposite window. At last! Nick had a name to match the face of the blonde haired, brown eyed 6'0" Mystery Man. Jay. It was nice, Nick thought, it went well with his dashing appearance. Nick stuck up the words 'it's nice!'. The next day the reply of 'i like urs too' appeared in the opposite window. 

The conversation over paper butterflies continued for a week or so, with them discussing their interests, likes and dislikes, discussing their majors. Nick learned that Jay was doing a physical education degree, he had a football scholarship. His favourite bands mother mother and gorillaz and his secret obsession was black pink. He hated maths, but he was pretty good at it. He was scared of swimming. He had a single father. He drove a yellow Toyota. All unimportant information, but it was important to Nick. He felt close to a man he had never met and had never even heard of until a week ago. But he felt closer to him than he had ever felt to another man. He was adamant that it wasn't a crush, but his heart disagreed. The problem with your heart disagreeing with your brain is that your brain usually wins, and it had particularly won in this circumstance. His brain said it was a close friendship, like Jay was a brother, but Nick' heart begged and begged for his brain to accept his attraction but the brain stood its ground and the heart lost. 

The conversation continued for another few days, but communicating over post its was getting annoying. They would constantly fall down, they would spell things backwards, and what if the other one didn't even see the message. This thought must have been going through both the boy's head because soon after, there was a message that shocked and surprised Nick Carraway. For written in yellow post it notes in Jay's window was 'Number?' and Nick didn't know what to respond to this forward request.


	3. chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> is he home of phobic???????

It had been about a day since Jay had asked for Nick's number. He has been wondering whether it was out of attraction or friendship. What he didn't know was that it was out of frustration at post its and their backwards slow ways of communication. However likely the latter may be, the thought of attraction never left never left Nick's mind, but the battle between the heart and the head was still ongoing, and the head was unfortunately winning. Nick tossed and turned all night, the war had the most action while he was asleep. He decided not to tell Jordan about Jay's question because he feared that she would act too... Jordany. Eventually he decided that he better make haste and post up his number. He opened his desk drawer faster than you could say 'Nick Carraway'. He stuck them up as his phone number – '01632 960539'. He sat on his bed restless, tapping his foot at speeds going past the sound barrier.

It was another half hour until a soft ping radiated from his phone. Nick jumped up as fast as a cheetah and sprinted to his phone. He picked it up and saw the words 'iMessage notification' He opened it to see the word 'hey :)' plastered across his phone. He looked out the window to see

07533002875  
Hey :)

Nick  
hey :)  
i cant think of a name for u

0753302875  
I mean my surnames gatsby so what about just Jay Gatsby

Nick  
ughhhh thats so boring  
ill put jay from across the way  
im truly a poet

jay from across the way  
You said mine was boring but yours is that long?  
Honestly.

Nick  
fine i'll just put jay  
smh

jay  
Smh?

Nick   
shaking my head

jay  
Ah.   
What's your surname so I can put it on my phone?

Nick  
plssssss no i hate it its so long and ugly

jay  
Nick please tell me.

Nick  
laying down the law huh?  
ok fine  
its......  
carraway   
IK ITS SO UGLY IGNORE ME

jay  
No, I think it's nice.

Nick Carraway  
ur just flattering me

jay  
What will you do if I am?

Nick Carraway  
oomf hates me

jay  
Oomf?

Nick Carraway  
one of my friends/followers  
do u even have twitter?

jay  
No, I've never been big into social media.

Nick Carraway  
why do i even talk to u  
i hate it here

jay  
No, don't say that!

Nick Carraway  
girl it's a joke

jay  
I'm not a girl?

Nick Carraway  
smh honestly  
i forgot you were boring

The conversation continued like this for another few days. They were very happy simply communicating over text. Nick taught Jay more text speech, and he was learning quickly. Nick eventually convinced Jay to remove the Carraway from his name, he thought it was way too formal. In the battle between the heart and the head of Nick Carraway, the heart was slowly winning, but the head didn't know it yet.

Something we haven't talked about yet, dear reader, is the battle in Jay Gatsby's heart and head. Jay Gatsby was very comfortable with his sexuality, he was positive he was straight. But there was turmoil brewing deep inside Gatsby's body. The heart had an opinion for the first time, but it wasn't an opinion the head liked. So the head buried it deep down, deep down where no one could ever see it, not even himself. Jay's head had hopped that these feelings and emotions would never come back up, but they were, and the head didn't know how. The head didn't realise that Nick Carraway was as close as he was. 'But,' the brain thought 'We live with a man, we live with Tom Buchanan. Everyone likes him, if we don't, then we are straight. Even if we do like someone, who could it be?' The head was utterly clueless, and couldn't realise what was right in front of him.

One day, a surprising text came from Jay. It came as a struck to Nick, he was sure he finally had Jay all figured out, but obviously not.

jay  
Do you know daisy?  
I think she lives near you.

Nick   
daisy carraway?  
yeah shes my cousin

Now, you may think that Nick is being very chill about something like this, but in truth, he is twisting up inside. See, he now believes that Jay Gatsby is as straight as a stick, when he had just decided that maybe he was not. Nick was very close to realising his true feelings, but that will take a while yet. But for now, Nick will be sad, Nick will be upset and Nick will be destroyed. But Nick knows deep down that as long as Jay is happy he will be happy, and if making Jay happy means loosing him to a woman, then he will do that.

jay  
I kind of like her, do you think you could introduce us?

Nick  
yeah  
i can do that :)

Nick was not in fact happy, despite his little emoticon saying otherwise.

jay  
Thank you very much!  
You truly are a good friend.

The word friend struck like a knife into Nick's perfect little life, a silver bullet to a werewolf, a wooden stake to a vampire. It wounded him in a way he had not been wounded before. He didn't know why it hurt so bad, but I'm sure you can put two and two together. Tom and Daisy were together but were on the verge of breaking up, their relationship was not a happy one.

jay  
OH!   
Before you say that Daisy and Tom are in a relationship, I wanted to say that I know, and that I know that they aren't happy.

Nick  
oh cool :)

jay  
Talking about Tom, did you know he's a bisexual?

Nick  
yeah

jay  
Wow you truly know everything

Nick   
i know  
im a genius

jay  
How did you know?  
He's a pretty public person but he hasn't actually told that many people.

Nick  
uhhhhhh  
im not sure i really want to tell u

jay  
You can tell me anything  
Also I really want to know

Nick  
do i have to tell you?

Nick braced himself for the words that were about to come out his mouth, and prayed that Jay wouldn't abandon him.

jay  
Yes please tell me. 🥺

Nick  
getting comfy with the emojis there

jay  
Don't change the subject, Nick

Nick  
okokok  
he's my ex

jay  
?

Nick  
im gay, jay  
read 16:39


	4. chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> gay panic tm: the book

Jay hadn't replied for three days, not since Nick said he was gay. It's not like he was coming out for the first time, he thought, he had been out for a few years at this point. He had had people turn away from him after hearing that he was gay, it was to be expected, but this time felt different. It felt worse. Usually when someone turned away from him, he felt bad for a few days, but he would always soon realise that they were never good people and he was better off without them. But he had truly hoped that Gatsby wasn't a bad person, but he feared all his worst nightmares had come true. In his time of great need, he knew that there was only one person he could talk to, and he truly didn't want to talk to her. He picked up his phone and called Jordan, tears still swelling in his eyes. There was a few moments of silence before Jordan sliced through it like it was butter.

"Oh my fucking god, what do you want now, Nick?" Jordan angrily spoke into the phone. She wasn't yelling but you could hear her voice slowly get more and more pissed.  
"How do you know I want something?" Nick whispered feebly into the phone.  
"You only ever call me when you want something." she responded strongly.  
"Can you come over please?" Nick pleaded.  
Jordan groaned and replied "Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhh fine. You're so needy sometimes, I swear." Nick hung up and lay down on his bed waiting for Jordan to come over.

He had given her a key because the amount of times he needed her were getting ridiculous, and he was tired of getting out of bed to get the door. Jordan had not been so kind as too give a key to her dorm to Nick, he presumed it was down to the having sex with another random woman every few days. Jordan thought he didn't know, but the walls ere paper thin and so he heard every bump and sound that came from the other room. A few moments later, he heard a key turn in the door. Jordan stepped in. She was accompanied by Daisy who was attached to one of her arms. They stepped over to Nick's bed and both sat down.

"Hey Daisy." Nick said, glancing in the small girl's general direction.   
"Hey." She replied. Jordan found this conversation exceedingly boring, so she cut into the silence for the second time that day.   
"Nick, I may find you incredibly annoying sometimes, if not most of the time, maybe even all of the time..."  
"Get to the point." Nick interrupted.   
Jordan glared at him. "...But I still care about you, and wether you like it or not, I am your friend. What's going on?" Jordan said, sounding slightly nicer than earlier, but still with her trademarked sarcasm.  
"You're such a great friend." Nick responded, rolling his eyes.   
"Haha shut up and answer the question."   
"Ok ok. So you know Jay from the other building, the one you study with? The one I was chatting to over post its?"  
"Yeah."  
"Well, we started texting about a week ago and I think I scared him off."  
"Jesus Nick, what did you do this time?" Jordan groaned.  
"Literally nothing oh my god." Nick barked in reply.  
"Ok, what happened then?"  
Nick paused. "I was gay."  
"Nick you god damn idiot, you're still gay and you always were always will be gay. What did you actually do?"  
"I told Jay that I was gay over text and he read the text and he didn't reply and I sent it three days ago and..." Nick was hyperventilating. He wanted to continue but Jordan interrupted.   
"Nick, listen to me. Listen to my voice. Calm down, it'll be ok." Nick's breathing slowed down, Jordan's unusually calm voice reassured the worried man. "If Jay is what I believe you are saying, a homophobe, then you will know that you would never be good friends. But I do not believe that Jay is homophobic, and I do not believe that your friendship is over." Again, the word friendship struck into Nick's heart but soothed his head. "I also do not believe that you want your friendship to end. Jay is a good person, he wouldn't hurt you. I'm sure that there's a good reason he hasn't responded, and if there isn't, I pray to god that he's prepared to what I will do to him." Jordan spoke, her speech resonated with Nick. He had calmed down now, his breathing returning to a steady pace. His heart stopped racing, his head stopped spinning and his stomach untied. Daisy and Jordan stayed for another hour or two just chilling.

The next day, a ping erupted from Nick's phone. He picked it up to see the word 'jay' across his screen.

jay  
Hi!  
I am so sorry I didn't respond earlier.  
My phone died and I couldn't find a charger.

This, of course, was a lie. He was actually rethinking his entire stance on love, but had come to the unlikely conclusion that he was straight. But the war in Jay Gatsby's heart and head was still going on, and was more fierce than ever.

Nick  
oh no problem :)

Nick had responded in a very chill manner, but he was not very chill. His stomach had twisted up and his throat was tightening, he felt like he was choking again. He gasped for air, his lungs were screaming that they were drowning. He took a minute to calm down and went to get water.

jay  
Again, I am so sorry.

Nick  
srsly no problem

It was a problem to Nick

jay  
To make it up to you, can I get you a coffee at the café down stairs?

Nick's heart skipped a beat, but plummeted when he realised that he couldn't go. Nick was immune compromised, it was a gene that ran in his family. It meant that he couldn't go see anyone or do anything during covid.

Nick  
i am so so sorry  
i cant

jay  
Why not?

Nick  
im immune compromised  
im meant to stay inside because i could really easily get covid

jay  
Oh ok  
Well maybe after covid then?

Nick  
that sounds nice :)

The two continued talking for a while, into the early hours of the morning. Nick's heart was slowly beating his head, and Jay's heart was slowly realising that it could fight back against his head. But, something they both didn't realise was that their hearts were slowly connecting.


	5. chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> gay denial tm: the book

It had been 2 days since Jay asked Nick to go on a trip to the café together. The café they spoke of was famous on the campus. It was what you could call a hipster café, but the people who went were far from hipsters. The café was inviting to everyone of every creed and colour. They regularly had low key concerts of local bands, but they had of course, stopped due to the restrictions. They had coffees for days, you could have whatever you want, a cinnamon mocha or a peppermint tea. They always had seasonal things like gingerbread hot chocolates at Christmas and sakura iced tea in summer. The café was on the pricier side, but it was worth it for a good, well made hot drink. They also served food on Tuesdays to Saturdays, lunch and brunch. Nick's favourite was the tuna melt that they served during autumn, it was always so fresh and warm. Jay's favourite was the pumpkin salad that they served in winter, it was so healthy and delicious. Jordan's favourite, surprisingly was a triple chocolate caramel honey brownie they served year round. It had enough calories to last a bear through the winter, but Jordan ate them like berries you popped into your mouth. For a woman doing a sport degree, she ate incredibly unhealthily.

I tell you about this destination, dear reader, so that your mouth starts watering at the scent and idea of this idyllic café, the safe haven for all students studying here. Nick adored this café, and he was distraught at having to decline Jay's offer for a trip there, he would love to go with or without Jay, but he just couldn't as the risk for him was too high. Jay was saddened by the refusal of the offer as well, but he understood why Nick wouldn't want to go due to his condition, Jay would rather have an alive, isolated Nick than a dead Nick. It was then that he realised that he cared for Nick, he cared a great deal. If Tom said that he couldn't go, then Jay wouldn't care, he would go without him, but Jay felt that he went to the café without Nick he would feel guilty, and he wouldn't be able to live with himself. Nick on the other hand, hoped that Jay would go without him, he didn't want Jay to miss out on an enjoyable experience on his behalf.

Jordan could hear the moping coming out of Nick's room and took it upon herself to go visit him to check how he was doing. She walked to the door and slid the key into the lock. It unlocked effortlessly with little resistance. She slid in, one foot in front of the other and saw Nick laying on his bed face down. She sat down next to him. Nick jolted right up, surprised to see Jordan sitting at the end. Nick rubbed his eyes alive so that he could clearly see her lean figure, shining in the evening light reflecting through the window, glowing onto her like an angle, a halo of light surrounding her head. Nick thought a messenger of god had come down to him, light rays shining off her like wings and sparkles of evening magic flowing off her into a pool of dreams and dusk at her feet. It was truly a beautiful sight, which is why Nick was truly disappointed when he saw that it was just Jordan in jogging bottoms and a t-shirt with scruffy, unwashed, un-brushed hair adorning her head and not a halo.

"Jordan what the fuck are you doing here?" Nick grumpily spoke.

"Um ok Mr I don't need any emotional help, I will leave you be. Dumbass, I came here because I could feel your despair, sadness and moping from the other side of that paper thin wall." Jordan replied with an air of annoyance. "What's wrong? Jay still hasn't replied?"

"No, he did." Nick responded.

"Ok then what's wrong?"

"Jay asked me to go to the café with him but I had to say that I couldn't because, y'know, I might die if I get covid, anyway I feel really bad for saying no, and I really want him to go, I don't want to hold him back from an enjoyable activity but I really wish I wasn't the way I am so I could go and-" Nick babbled on but Jordan interrupted.

"Oh my god."

"What?" Nick replied.

"You are totally in love with Jay Gatsby. Oh my god." Jordan laughed.

"What? No I'm not, that's ridiculous." Nick defended.

"You, Nick Carroway, are head over heels in love with Jay Gatsby." Jordan replied.

"Jordan, I can guarantee you that I do not love Jay." Nick snapped.

"No no no, I didn't say you love him, I said that you're in love with him." Assured Jordan.

"Please care to elaborate." Nick replied, his head thought that the idea of him being attracted to Jay was simply, truly, preposterous.

"I'm stupid, I thought you wanted to be like him, but now I realise that you want to be with him. Oh my god this is amazing." Jordan giggled, she was acting like a child who's favourite tv couple had just gotten together.

"Jay isn't queer, he's so straight." Nick reassured Jordan. You could see this as him disagreeing with Jordan or simply talking to himself, to tell himself that Jay was was straight to stop himself from heartbreak. If it was his heart talking he would not of said this statement, he would speak of joy and glee, but his head still had power and it told him to repress his feelings.

"Nick. Spaghetti is straight before it gets hot and wet. You just need to get him into you! Oh my god this is going to be so fun!"

"Jordan, I do not want to get Jay into me because I am not into him. Simple as."

"You are incredibly stubborn, you are so in love with him!" Jordan spoke as a smile spread from ear to ear.

"Get out." snapped Nick, pointing towards the door.

"Sorry what?" Jordan queried.

"Get out of my room. The fact that you even dare to insinuate that I like Jay Gatsby is offensive, rude and plain incorrect." Nick started pushing Jordan towards the door.

"Ok fine. You are so unthankful. Live your truth, Nick, but don't let it hurt you." She said as she was practically kicked out of the room. Jordan went back to her room, looking upset, but as soon as she knew that Nick couldn't see her, she broke out into a smile, laughing at Nick's stubbornness.

Nick felt that there was only one thing he could do to prove his lack of attraction to Jay in the eyes of Jordan. He picked up his phone and opened messages.

Nick  
jay?

jay  
Yeah?

Nick  
i think i actually might be able to go to the cafe if i keep safe

jay  
Yay!  
What time would you like to?

Nick  
how about tomorrow for lunch  
1:30?

jay  
Sounds good!  
I'll see you then.

Nick  
see you :)


	6. chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> lets go on a date. jk. unless???

The day of Nick and Jay's café outing arrived as fast as the morning sun rises. Nick knew in his head that he would prove Jordan wrong for every lie she spread and spewed about his attraction to one Jay Gatsby, but his heart begged to finally be free of the chains binding it to the head, it yearned to break loose of the brain's controlling grasp, and it just wished to sing and fly. He wore his freshly ironed shirt, it was a pale blue with ruffles at the sleeves. He wore plain black jeans to go with it, crisp and clean. He cuffed the bottoms, and put on his favourite pair of simple doc martin's boots that went to just above the ankle. He had chosen this shirt because Daisy had made a matching mask out of the same fabric, she had made the shirt as well. She made a lot of clothes for Nick, usually things in shops that didn't fit him well, he had a really weird size. He threw on a sherlock esque brown trench coat to finish off the look.

He made his way down stairs, almost running down, and bumped into Kai Springer, a music theory major who lived a few doors down. He primarily played piano, but also dabbled in organ. He had incredibly curly black hair and wore a long multi-coloured scarf that reached the floor. He was a big party goer, so he was always either at a party, planning a party or going to a party. if there was a party on campus, Kai was the first to hear about it. Nick, in comparison disliked going to parties. He didn't hate them, he was happy with other people going but he just didn't enjoy them himself. Nick and Kai went to the same high school, so they reminisced over their high school peers and experiences, but other than that they barely had anything in common. Well, except for the fact that they were both incredibly gay. Kai slept with everyone and everything, gay boys, straight boys, bi boys and every other boy in between.

"Ah, Nick! Did you hear, there's going to be a massive rager at Tom Buchannan's next week. He said everyone's invited. I know you don't like parties but the door's always open if you wanna, y'know, go? Or, like, come with me?" Kai said while rubbing his neck. He was generally quite suave and smooth, but when he talked to Nick he became a gibbering mess. This is because, dear reader, Kai Springer is completely and utterly infatuated with Nick, ever since they were in school together, and he's the one person Kai has failed to sleep with after countless tries. Nick, being the innocent little thing he is, is completely oblivious to this fact. 

"Oh no, it's ok, I really don't like parties. Thanks for the offer though!" Nick smiled to Kai's blushing face. Kai's face instantly turned to annoyance.

"No problem." he spoke through gritted teeth. He continued up the stairs, immediately forgetting his failed attempt at flirting with Nick and started scheming his next plan to get Nick to have sex with him. 

Nick continued down the stairs, walking across the quad. It was a brisk spring day, a light breeze was spreading through the campus, unlike the deadly disease that was spreading through the country. Green, luscious leaves were starting to grow back on trees and the pink cherry blossoms were coming out. It didn't take long for him to reach the café. He went in and instantly saw Jay's face on the other side of the room, recognising him from their hours of facetime calls. It took Jay a couple of seconds to see him.

"Hey, Jay! Nice to finally see you in person." Nick said with a smile and a wave.

"You too." Jay smiled in return. He pulled out a seat and gestured to it. "Come on, sit, sit." Nick sat daintily in the chair. "How's your lock down been?"

"Good, just really boring. I've literally done nothing except write poems."

"Oh yeah, how's your degree going?"

"Pretty good, English is one of things you don't really need to be in a physical class for. I'm just gonna presume you're doing laps around your dorm for your degree." Nick laughed.

"Yeah, it's kind of hard. But we can do running in the field while socially distant luckily." Jay said while rubbing his neck. 

A waiter came up to them and asked what they wanted. Nick ordered a peppermint tea while Jay ordered a hot chocolate with whipped cream. They spent the next few hours just chatting about school and lock down and studies and all that. They grew more comfortable around each other.

"I was actually writing a poem about lock down the other day. I, um, have it here if you want to hear it?" Nick said, after a conversation about favourite books that they were re-reading during lock down. 

"Yeah sure, I'd love to hear it!" Jay said in response. 

"Ok ok.. Trapped in a cage of my own creation

Against my will, I'm held with no end in sight.

Look to the right and all you'll find are

Empty words of lies and manipulation.

Look to the left and all you'll find are

Promises of early freedom if we just remain controlled."

Nick looked up from his paper to face Jay. He noticed his perfect blond hair lining his gorgeous face, his beautiful blue eyes shining like ocean waves in the midnight moonlight. He noticed his star struck gaze towards himself, their eyes connecting for a split second. Nick was reminded of the split second when he first saw Jay in the opposite window. He noticed all the little things about Jay, like his dimple on his cheek that he just wanted to dive into, his smile reaching from ear to ear, the kind of smile that would make anyone happy. He noticed a splatter of freckles across his face, like glowing stars like pin pricks in the night sky. He noticed his radiating skin, perfectly clean and pimple free. Nick gasped in suddenly as he realised something his heart had been yearning for for weeks. He put his hand to his mouth and stopped abruptly half way through the poem. 

"Nick? You ok? You stopped..." Jay queried.

"Yeah, yeah, I just realised that um I have a class in five minutes, so I should really go. I'm so sorry. We'll talk again soon." Nick picked up all his stuff and ran out the door.

"Bye then.." Jay said, left behind with a sense of loneliness and regret.

"Nick stopped in the middle of the quad, picked up his phone and called Jordan. Suprising him, Daisy picked up the phone.

"Nicky? What's up?" Daisy said in her dainty voice.

"Is Jordan there? I really need to speak to her."

"Yeah, let me just get her. JORDAN! IT'S NICKY, HE SAID HE REALLY NEEDS TO TALK. She'll be right there, just hang on a second, Nicky." 

Nick stood still, waiting for Jordan. He waited a solid two minutes until she came to the phone and nearly started yelling down it.

"Nick, I was in the god damn shower, what the fuck do you want."

"Jordan, Jordan. I made a mistake, I'm so sorry." Nick took a deep inhalation before continuing. "I fucked up."

"What did you do?"

"I fell in love with Jay Gatsby."


	7. chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hetero panic????? jk closeted gay panic.

Something I have thought about while narrating to you the life of Nick and Jay is that we haven't talked much about Jay. I have told you everything about our dear friend Nick, but I have been lacking in providing information about one Jay Gatsby. Now, on the surface Jay may just appear to be a dumb, blonde, bimbo, but he is much deeper than that. He has layers, he has stories of vanquish and revenge. He has tale of warriors battling monsters in wars of glory and vain. We go now to Jay finishing his hot chocolate.

Jay finished his hot chocolate rather rapidly after this point, he had a lot of thoughts flowing through his mind. He paid the waiter and ran out the door. He sprinted across the quad to his dorm block and leaped up the stairs to his room. He busted open and barged in to find Tom in a rather compromising position with Kai Springer. The pair just looked over to Jay, legs tangled together, Tom with a face of surprise and Kai with an air of annoyance. Jay pointed towards the door.

"Get out, I need to do some work." He practically yelled.

"Jesus Jay, take us out for dinner first." Kai smirked.

"Shut the FUCK up Kai. I've had a long day and have a lot to think about. Get out. Both of you." Jay spoke.

"Where the fuck are we meant to go, Jay? I don't know if you can see, but we're kind of in the middle of something here." Tom replied.

"Go to Kai's room, go outside. I do NOT care where you go as long as you do not stay here."

"Ok, ok! Chill the hell down." Tom responded to the angered Jay. Jay picked up a baseball bat that they kept by the door. He held it by two hands and raised it above his head.

"Get. The fuck. Out." Jay spoke in a quiet, well mannered tone. Tom and Kai started yelling at him.

"Woah woah woah, ok ok, we're leaving!" said Kai.

"PUT THE FUCKING BAT DOWN, WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?" Tom said, less politely than Kai. The two scooped each other up, along with a couple of sheets and blankets. Jay held the door open for them and led them out. As soon as all four feet were out, he slammed the door shut and threw the bat across to Tom's bed. He yelled in anguish. As Tom and Kai were running down the corridor, they wondered what was going on.

Jay leaned against the door. He slid a hand through his hair and slid down the door. He sat on the ground as a tear rolled down his face. He wiped it away, but more kept coming. He couldn't wipe them away fast enough so he just let them come. He cried for a solid fifteen minutes until he could finally calm down enough to breath normally. He went to sit on his bed and he lay back to look at his ceiling, where there was a smattering of glow in the dark stars, waiting for the night to come so that it could glow as bright and beautiful the actual stars in the midnight sky. He held his face. He lay there for a half hour before finally thinking about how he was feeling. He thought back to the café. He thought back to Nick's poem and to his features. He thought back to his slick black hair. He thought back to his fascinating brown eyes, as deep as the grand canyon and as astonishing as well. He thought back to his gleaming smile, a shining spectacle of joy and glee. No, stop, he thought. He didn't like thinking about a friend in this way. He sat up and looked out his window to see Nick in Jordan's room, they were talking to each other on her bed. He didn't like how happy Nick made him feel. He didn't like how whole he made him feel. He didn't like how complete he made him feel. He didn't like how he made him feel. But in a way, he did like how Nick made him feel. It was a new feeling, a refreshing one. 

After a bit of moping, Jay sat up to look across to Nick's room. He still wasn't in there, but he saw him in Jordan's room. He looked happy, he was laughing. Jay wasn't sure if he was laughing at something Jordan had said or if he was laughing about himself. Something fluttered down in Jay's soul when he saw Nick so happy. He felt happy because Nick was. But it was a different kind of happy. Not the kind of happy when your dumbass friend finally succeeds at something, not the kind of happy when you get a birthday present you really wanted, a different kind. A romantic kind. The kind where you hope that you pass each other in the halls so you can steal a glance from one another, the kind where you learn what time they go on social media so you can interact with them, the kind where you leave notes of sweet nothings under each other's door. This particular kind of happiness is called love. Jay had fallen down a rabbit hole of attraction towards Nick, but he wouldn't notice until he hit the bottom. 

Jay composed himself after a couple minutes of brooding over his thoughts. He picked up the duvet that had fallen off his bed in the kufufle with Kai and Tom. Their boxers and shirts lay on the floor, Jay was afraid to go near it, fearing it had become infected with some form of bodily fluid. He picked them up with tongs from the kitchen and put it into a bin bag. He spent a solid hour deep cleaning the room, in order to erase any evidence of his breakdown. He looked over to Nick sitting by Jordan and he felt the flutter in his soul again. The flutter of a flame igniting after being out for a while.


	8. chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a gay is gay and consoles a gay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw// mention of attempted suicide

Nick was sitting at the foot of Jordan's bed, tears pouring out his eyes. He was leaning against the back wall. Daisy was sitting next to him, holding him in a warm embrace while jordan was sitting opposite Nick. You could tell that she knew this was coming but she didn't want to say I told you so.

"I didn't mean to!!!" Nick cried. Daisy handed him a tissue and he blew his nose.

"I know you didn't, Nick." Jordan replied. "It's in your nature to fall for the next hunky guy you meet. It's happened before."

Nick sniffed up his tears and wiped his eyes. "W-what do you mean?"

"It happened with Sam, and Will and Antonio and Tom. God, you fell hard for Tom. But you slept together like twice, you realised he's a dick and you broke up." Daisy hit Jordan on the arm as her and Tom were still together. "Stop it Daisy, you'll realise who's better for you soon." Jordan said to Daisy. She turned back to face Nick. "Now you never wanna see Tom again. It'll be the same with Jay. Just ignore him and you'll be fine." Jordan said. She had seen it happen before with Nick, he fell for people quite often. 

"But Jordan, I didn't feel this way for Tom. When I was with Tom, I was just horny and young, and he was the first guy who would sleep with me. With Jay, my heart...it just flutters. It yearns to soar." Nick cried.

"Then let it soar. But, if you do, you will be hurt. He will hurt you and you will not come back from the pain. He doesn't like you. He never will. It would be better for you if you got over it, got past seeing him as a romantic interest, because he will never see you as one." Jordan said in reply. She was worried about what Nick might do if he followed his heart, and how Jay could hurt him, but she wasn't showing it in a kindred way. "I'm concerned about you, Nick. Everytime this happens, you go into a spiral so deep that I thought I nearly lost you a couple times."

"It won't happen with him, I promis-" Nick began, but Jordan interrupted him.

"No, Nick, you don't understand. You nearly died, you would of if I hadn't seen you. I don't want it to come to that again. I love you, Nick, and I can't lose you." Jordan replied, her concerns genuine. She had lost people before and she didn't want to lose another. She didn't want Daisy to go through the same hurt she did. She began to slowly cry. She got up to go to the window and looked across to Jay. She wiped tears off her face.

"Do you mean that? Do you genuinely mean that?" Nick questioned. No reply came from Jordan so Daisy piped up.

"She does, Nicky. You are her bestest friend. Come on, I'll take you back to your room." Daisy bundled up Nick and supported him on her shoulder. They walked out of the room together and walked a couple steps to get to Nick's dorm. The walked in and Nick collapsed on his bed. 

"Daisy, it just doesn't feel right. I've never felt like this before." Nick said, laying on his side.

"Nicky, I think that you should forget about it for a bit. Wait until you know more about Jay, wait until you know more about his attraction. I don't want you to get hurt, and neither does Jordan, she just can't say that in a nice way. Please just look after yourself. I love you Nick, and so does Jordan. We want the best for you." Daisy responded to the despondent boy. She looked down at her watch. "Nick, I have to go back, we are watching the debut of that new film...what's the one??? I can't remember. Anyway, we're watching it on the tv and it starts really soon, and I think you just need some time. I'll talk to you really soon, I'll come over as soon as the film ends. I love you, mwah." And with that Daisy blew a kiss and spun out the room in one swift move.

Nick was exhausted by all the drama so he lay down for a nap. He was abruptly awoken approximately 47 minutes later by a smash of something against the wall followed by yelling coming from next door. He thought it was Daisy and Jordan, but he realised the voices were male. He heard the door slam and someone stomping down the hallway. Nick looked out his door and saw Tom Buchanan of all people storming down the corridor.

"YEAH, YOU FUCK OFF! DON'T COME BACK, YOU ASS." Nick looked to see where the voice was coming from. He turned to see Kai Springer yelling out from his dorm. "Tsk." Nick heard Kai mutter. 

"Hey, Kai! What was that?" Nick asked. 

"Ughhhhh come over I'll tell you." Kai said as he walked back into his dorm.

When Nick walked in to Kai's dorm, he saw how much of a mess it was. There was a broken plate on the floor, which Nick figured out was the smash that woke him up. He saw sheets strewn across the floor and furniture moved out of it's normally meticulous place. 

"Fuck...God, I hate him." Kai said.

"What's wrong? What happened in here?" Nick responded. His curiosity was peaking and he wanted to know more. 

"I didn't know he had a girlfriend...God, I never sleep with boys that have girlfriends, I'm not just some plaything for bi-curious men that want to know what it's like to feel the touch of a man." Kai replied, he was beginning to tear up, but he was still obviously very angry.

"Who? Tom?" Nick said, looking out the window to see Tom running across the campus. He was getting many odd looks but he didn't care. Kai nodded. "Kai, Tom isn't bi-curious. He's just bi and a dick. He's an asshole. He cheated on me when...when I was with him, and now he's cheated on Daisy. It's not your fault." Nick consoled the troubled man.

"Fuck....Daisy's his girlfriend? Daisy Carraway? Your cousin Daisy?" Nick nodded to his question. "She's so sweet. How could he...how could he do this to her?" Kai said as he slid down a wall.

"I don't know, Kai. I really don't know." 

"And you said he cheated on you as well?"

"Yes he did."

"I'm going to KILL him." Kai yelled.

"Kai, no. Forget about him."

"What do I tell Daisy? Sorry your boyfriend cheated on you with me. Jesus, what do I do?" Kai said, looking up to Nick.

"Don't worry about it, I'll tell her. You just need to calm down. I can come over again later to help you clean up if you need me to." Nick said while picking up his phone. 

"Thank you Nick, you're a...you're a good friend." Kai said. Nick had his back towards him and was walking towards the door, so he couldn't see the eyes of affection that were plastered on Kai's face. When Nick got out into the corridor he called Daisy.

"Hey Nicky, what's up? You doing ok?"

"Daisy it's important, I really need to come talk to you asap."

"Oh yeah sure, you can come over now if you want. the film was pretty bad anyway so we stopped watching it."

"Thanks Daisy."


	9. chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> oh no daisy is important

"What an ASSHOLE!"

"I know, Daisy, I know."

"How could he?? After everything I did for him, how could he?"

Daisy was sitting on Jordan's bed, crying her eyes out, Jordan comforting her. Nick had just told Daisy that Tom had been cheating on her. Nick was familiar with Tom cheating on people so he had just stepped outside for Jordan to work her magic.

"Daisy, are you going to break up with him?" Jordan asked in a quiet manner.

"OF COURSE I'M GOING TO FUCKING BREAK UP WITH HIM. I'LL DO IT RIGHT NOW." Daisy yelled, she was angrier than a thousand burning suns.

"No, Daisy, you don't need to do that..." Jordan said. She, of course, wanted Daisy to do that.

Daisy picked up her phone and immediately called Tom. She had him on speed dial, of course. It didn't take long fo him to pick up.

"Hey babe, what's up?" Tom asked, he sounded tired, out of breath, like he had just run across the campus, but he had just done that, so it was excused.

"You ASSHOLE. YOU BITCH. IT'S OVER." Daisy screamed. Nick didn't even know that the small girl was capable of producing such noise.

"Huh?? What happened babe?" asked Tom, knowing exactly what he had done wrong.

"DON'T BABE ME. I KNOW YOU SLEPT WITH KAI. IT'S OVER."

"Wait wait wai-" Tom started but it was too late as Daisy had already hung up. She was bright red and angry. Jordan was just in shock over what happened.

"Holy shit...Daisy, are you ok?" Jordan asked, concerned for the small girl. Daisy started walking over and sat down on the bed next to Jordan.

"Yeah....yeah, i'm fine." replied Daisy, pausing halfway through her sentence. She leaned her head on Jordan's shoulder but she didn't notice her hand slip into Jordan's as well.

Nick breathed a deep sigh as relief washed over him. He went back to his dorm and collapsed on his bed. He had a nap to finish. He was woken again a half hour later by a ping on his phone. He had received a message from Kai.

kai

nick what happened in there???

nick<3

nothing much rly

daisy pretty much just yelled at t*m and broke up with him

kai

PLSSS NOT YOU CENSORING TOM LMAOOO

nick<3

i have to do something against his scourge

kai

anyway how are you? you looked really tired when u came over

nick<3

yuh thats probably because i was really tired

kai

lol why

nick<3

i went to the caf and i probably shouldnt of and now im just kinda worn out

kai

damn i hope ur ok

nick<3

nah i hope ur ok

u did find out about tom dating daisy anyway

kai

im fine

i kinda knew he was an ass anyway

nick<3

yeah he is ik from experience

anyway

i gtg

i have a nap i have to catch up on

kai

YEAH LMAO SORRY ABOUT THAT

Nick put down his phone and tried to go back to sleep but as soon as he nearly fell asleep another ping radiated from it. 

"YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME OH MY GOD." yelled Nick, but he calmed down when he saw that Jay was the one that had messaged him.

jay<3 

I hope you weren't late for your lesson.

Nick

huh

jay<3

You had to leave early because you had a lesson?

Nick

oh 

yeah

i didnt miss it

jay<3

That's good.

Do you know what happened to Tom?

He looks kind of shaken

Nick

uh

nope

no idea

no idea whatsoever

jay<3

Are you sure?

Nick

yep

no idea

jay<3

Ok....

Well I have a lesson I need to go to. 

Nick

bye<3

ily

jay<3

What

Nick

what

jay<3

Ok...

Anyway, some mates and I are throwing a party for lockdown ending.

You're welcome to come

If you want

Nick

ill think about it

thanks tho

i have to go i have a nap to finish

jay<3 

Ok bye.

Nick

jeeze ok

jay<3 

What?

Nick 

nvm

Nick put his phone down on his chest and yelled.

"FUUUUUCK." He screamed out of desperation. He heard Jordan yell from the other side of the wall.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?"

"I'M IN LOVE, ASSHAT!"

"I KNOW, DICKWEED. GO TO BED."

And so Nick went back to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM SORRY FOR THE SHORT CHAPTER AFTER SO LONG!!! THE NEXT CHAPTER WILL BE LONGER AND ALSO UPDATED SOONER HOPEFULLY I'VE JUST HAD SO MUCH SCHOOL WORK SORRY BYE

**Author's Note:**

> I originally uploaded this fic to wattpad in october. Only like two people were reading it, so I thought i should upload it here. When I started writing this, I had no idea that the great gatsby was going to be in the public domain so soon. I really hope you enjoy reading this!


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